For many years, speech-language pathologists have suggested that parents of young children who stutter should, “talk like Mister Rogers.” Of course, most people of a certain age remember Mister Rogers, the beloved cardigan-wearing, fish-feeding, always-singing children’s television host—and one of my personal heroes. And most people of us remember how wonderful he made us feel as he helped us learn about ourselves and about life.
But what did clinicians mean, exactly, when they gave parents this advice? What specific speech characteristic did clinicians want parents to emulate—and why?
To answer to this question, we need to take a quick look at some powerful (though inaccurate) ideas from the history of our field. The first old idea has to do with the use of so-called “indirect” therapy approaches to early childhood stuttering therapy. For many (many) years, clinicians preferred therapy that explicitly refrained from addressing children’s speech production. Instead, they hoped to achieve changes in children’s speech solely through changes to their communication environments.
A key variable that was often targeted in such therapy was the parents’ speaking rates. Parents were taught to speak more slowly, modeling slower speech to their children, in the hopes that the children would then start to speak more slowly themselves—and that this would, in turn, cause the children to speak more fluently. Unfortunately, it didn’t turn out to work this way…research has shown that children generally don’t slow their speaking rate just because their parents did, but that’s a topic for another discussion.
One explanation for the popularity of such approaches can be found in the old “diagnosogenic” theory of stuttering, which suggested (more or less) that drawing attention to children's speech would cause them to become fearful about speaking and, ultimately, to develop stuttering. Today, we know that this theory is not true, but the idea left a lasting impression, causing generations of clinicians and caregivers to try to bring about changes in children’s speech without actually working on children’s speech!
So, how does that relate to Mister Rogers? Well, there is a general perception that Mister Rogers speaks more slowly than other people, and clinicians wanted to give parents a model that they could follow as they learned to speak more slowly themselves. Makes sense, yes? Of course, the truth turns out not to be so simple, because no one had ever asked whether Mister Rogers actually spoke more slowly. Sure, he had that soothing style, but was his speaking rate really the issue?
Never satisfied with just guessing about such matters, I decided to do some research on the topic. Not long after I moved to Pittsburgh (so that Mister Rogers could indeed be my neighbor), I reached out to Family Communications, Inc., and I asked if I could do a research project on Mister Rogers to analyze his speech. Of course, they said yes, and they provided us with many videos of Mister Rogers speaking, not just on his show but also in other venues. This led my students and me on a yearlong voyage that included very detailed, fine-grained analysis of his speaking style. (We all had such great self-esteem that year!!)
We looked at whether he truly spoke more slowly than other people or whether there was some other factor that contributed to the prevailing sense that his way of communicating with children was valuable. And…guess what we learned? Mister Rogers does not always speak slowly!
At first, we were shocked! When he produced a fast utterance, we would stare unbelievingly at the screen, checking and re-checking our numbers because sometimes he could be fast! Other times, he was indeed somewhat slower, but we quickly came to realize that it wasn’t really his speaking rate that set him apart. There was another characteristic of his speech that really made a difference, and this characteristic relates directly to helping children communicate more easily and more successfully.
That special characteristic? Pausing. By carefully measuring the duration of pauses, both within utterances (e.g., between phrases) and between utterances (e.g., after a speaking turn), we were able to discern that Mister Rogers consistently allowed just a bit of extra time for his audience to process and reflect on what he had said—and to plan what they themselves would say in response—before he continued speaking. This extra pause contributed to the overall unhurried pace of communication that people identify with Mister Rogers. The use of this extra pause ensured that everyone in the conversation knew that they had time to say what they wanted to say—and it helped them know that he would be listening to them when they did said it.
Take-Away: It's not about "slow speech"
What a beautiful and valuable lesson for us all! Pausing just a bit gives others a chance to talk gives us a chance to listen, and it ensures that everyone knows that their voice will be heard. That is one of the many lessons that Mister Rogers offered to us about how to talk with children—and with one another. And, that is the characteristic that I encourage parents and others, including clinicians, to emulate when talking with children, regardless of whether or not they stutter.
Although I never published the results of this work, I am grateful to Mister Rogers and Family Communications for allowing my team to take this deep dive into his speaking patterns. This work helped us identify just one of the many factors that made him an ideal role model for communicating with children.
Even more, I am personally grateful to Mister Rogers for his lasting legacy of helping each and every person know that they are special in their own way, including you. Thank you for reading.